Yeah. I said it. The title may be enough to write me off already: he is an old dinosaur who can’t keep up with the changing times, a bigot who hates people not like himself, exclusionary, intolerant, just an awful person, etc. I haven’t even had a chance to make my points, but probably you or someone you know thinks of me this way already. This lack of discussion is a big part of the problem, in my view.
Hopefully, I still have your attention. By no means, do I or any like-minded individuals want to condemn folks. We believe in our fellow Americans freedom of expression and right to differing views. That’s a core American value. We do not hate anyone for the expressions of themselves. Everyone is allowed to screw up their own lives: me, you, anyone. God love you. We might have pity, be disgusted, or be puzzled, but that does not equate to hatred. Are ours not valid human emotions? It seems we are told to suppress our feelings while LGBTQ folks are encouraged to express theirs. Father’s and mother’s are given a single day while LGBTQ folks get a whole month. Who is valued more? We object strongly when others attempt to indoctrinate our children in what we see as bad ideas. You can raise your kids to believe what you want, but not ours. Hopefully you are not yet wishing I shut up and go along with the program, although that’s a common reaction.
I try to reason with folks different than me. I see problems with this new agenda, so why shouldn’t I be allowed to criticize? Isn’t this the way we get to the right solutions? I might offer advice or a different perspective–if others want to hear. We do this because we actually care about others, but that subtlety is lost by many. You can always ignore us; there is no worse insult, but the more popular tactic is to label us. Transphobia is a widely used term that truly applies to very few. You shouldn’t be allowed to win an argument or shut down discussion with that term alone. Please, think more critically than this. Explain why it is so important for me to affirm–or more accurately, for me to comply with demands like using preferred pronouns. I listen and engage folks who articulate opposing views. I share their comments in many such posts. Let’s discuss. The truth will ultimately prevail–if you allow it or are not afraid of it, if you can absorb a bit of criticism without losing your self-identity.
Gay marriage was the issue ten years ago; today it is gender and sexual expression. Be gay or trans if you want. Have a same sex marriage if you want. We can’t stop you, nor do we want to. However, please quit trying to compel me and my children and other like-minded individuals to affirm your behavior. Admit it: our affirmation is what you want. If we disagree and speak openly about the problems of the LGBTQ agenda, we become the problem. Any criticism threatens the house of cards.
The argument used to be: just get out of our bedroom. Objectors never had any interest in your bedroom activities. Do what you like. We just disagree with you. I will criticize, but I don’t hate you. Don’t hate me for my views. Don’t label me in hopes of ending the argument. What other choice do I have? LGBTQ folks want to express themselves. Ok, but should I deny myself, deny my core values, so others can more fully express themselves? Compliance is not one of the distinguishing virtues for those of us willing to speak up.
Maybe the LGBTQ+ agenda is not all it has been sold to be. Let’s focus on how it is promoted. Let’s focus on how those who object are treated. Let’s focus on biology and gender. Let’s look at the inherent contradictions in what is articulated. Let’s focus on the denial of reality, the “normalization of delusion”, which is how we see this new ideology that was thrust upon us five seconds ago. For more on my thoughts on trans issues, see also: https://seek-the-truth.com/category/trans/.
A friend of mine told me this recently:
Gender, gender identity, and sexual orientation are not a matter of choice, they are a matter of biology. And biology is complicated and sometimes messy and the result doesn’t always fit neatly into binary boxes. That’s why conversion therapy and “praying away the gay” don’t actually work.
I think he is not totally correct. The “L” and “G” folks made biology a cornerstone of their agenda. We were told: gay people were born that way at birth. In fact, scientists kept looking for the gay gene to prove this theory (maybe they still are). I never had a problem accepting the “gay at birth” argument, but I still believe homosexuality is wrong. Gay folks have the added burden of remaining chaste. Life certainly is not fair, but we all have our difficulties to deal with. However, the “T” folks claim biology is irrelevant. They deride “sex assigned at birth”. Their true identity is not limited by biology; it cannot be determined until they have an opportunity to express it at a later age. It is totally opposite the argument for gay folks. You want biology to be the determining factor for one group, but not the other. This is where the problem unwinds for me; we unmoor ourselves from hard science and we tie this new gender theory to people’s ever changing feelings. This is why we are in for trouble.
I found a psychology site that defined terms a bit more precisely:
A person’s sex refers to their physical characteristics, such as male, female, and intersex. Gender is a separate concept that refers to their personal gender identity — for example, whether they identify as a man or a woman.
While some people’s gender identity matches their sex, this isn’t always the case. If a person’s gender identity doesn’t align with their sex, they might identify as nonbinary or transgender.
In the hands of a trusting public, this notion manifests in many ways. Again, your “identity” is based on your feelings. It is not a pre-determined reality. Many believe your gender can change from day to day. Today, I feel like a woman. Tomorrow not so much. Our feelings change frequently; I may feel very differently at the end of the day than I did when I woke up this morning. We should not allow our emotions, which can fluctuate wildly, to completely drive the major decisions in our lives. We have to accept our own limitations rather than turn our fantasy world into a reality. We need to base our new identities on something more substantial.
Sexuality is clearly wrapped around the core of gender theory. Once one’s gender is defined, it opens more sexual preferences as well. Many believe this is a good thing: more choices, more ways to express their unique identity. I am trying to be fair as I can in explaining this. Savannah Hernandez in the ten-minute video below interviews numerous folks at the DC Pride parade. They are all very happy to open up and explain to her who they are and what they believe.
The important concept for them seems to be the elimination of limiting factors. Biology is rigid, clearly male or female for almost all, but gender is freeing. There are more choices with gender; you can even define your own. It’s like mixing up new flavors of ice cream; the possible combinations are limitless and it is fun to experiment. You can also migrate from one choice to another until you strike upon the right one. The folks at the DC pride parade are clearly proud of this new world they have created, one that is so very different from the one I grew up in (in truth, such a world existed back in the day, but it was marginal).
Clash of Ideas
These folks also present themselves as very accepting. They want very much to be accepted themselves as well. That’s an understandable human emotion. They want to introduce others to this new world which they are so proud of. I understand that too. They also openly tell us children should be exposed, should know all the choices open to them, should be accepting, and should not be indoctrinated in the ideas of old folks like me. These ideas seem so natural to them. How could more choices, more freedom, possibly go wrong? This is a spot where they lose me.
On the flip side, judgment is a problem for them. Stigmas, taboos, guilt, criticism, even constructive criticism, are all very negative concepts to avoid. Morality, values, rules, and boundaries too are very limiting. In fact, these things are viruses; they must be extinguished and extinguished quickly. This is where the ideas clash. Here is where I stand:
- I don’t want to use your pronouns. This type of language is silly. I decline.
- Children should not be exposed; they are not yet ready for all this sexuality. They will be confused by the abundance of choices as well. More choices inevitably means more bad choices for them, and bad choices today can lead to a worse life to come.
- This ideology is also harmful to our culture. I think it will actually be the doom of it, and in not too much time.
- I don’t want to affirm this lifestyle. Again, I respect everyone’s independence to live their own lives, but I won’t say it is good and I won’t encourage it. In fact, I will discourage it or offer an alternative given the opportunity. I think my view is better (don’t we all think this way?), but I do not require you to accept mine. Just let me and others have our own views and express them in our own unique ways. That’s all we are asking from you. That’s all you say you are asking from us.
- My view is not so fragile that I need others affirmation to convince myself that it is right. Why is the LGBTQ crowd so shocked, so threatened, so angry, when we simply do not agree with their choices? Why are they so lacking in confidence? Don’t they believe their new-found coalition and their ideas will withstand the test of time? Most values I have adopted have been passed from generations long gone. They have lasted and served many well.
- Is our compliance the ultimate value now? Why am I painted as the bad guy for not getting on board with this agenda? Am I not allowed to be my own independent person, one who is different than you, but should be just as valued as anyone else?
- Finally, truth matters. I find much of this agenda to be a denial of reality.
It seems like a classic stalemate. I won’t affirm their lifestyle and viewpoints and they won’t affirm mine, so we each live our lives as we see fit. That’s the quintessential American view. We each have our views, so let things play out naturally and the most popular and most successful wins. But somehow that is not good enough; our lack of acceptance of the new agenda becomes a problem. In fact, it becomes THE problem. We are standing in the way of a Nirvana this oh-so-enlightened generation has just discovered; we dinosaurs are vilified for having an alternate point of view. Our points of view are so problematic, they must be censored. Sorry, but I think your version of Nirvana is not real. Truth, absolute truth, not simply your relative truth, is an actual thing. Sorry to be so blunt. Sharing the truth, tough love, is what our culture needs more than anything else these days. We can’t simply look the other way.
Of course, you may be right after all. Let’s put each of our ideas out there and let the best ideas win. Why not? Why are underhanded tactics used to diminish me and my ideas when all I am doing is withholding my acceptance of your worldview? Fight fairly, please. I am fine with your disagreement; you can ignore me and hope I go away, but don’t hate me for who I am and don’t censor me. I have just as much of a right to express myself as you do.
In the remainder of this post, I present problems with this new prideful lifestyle. I do not hate anyone who believes in it. I do not encourage anyone else to hate. I simply point out why I cannot add my imprimatur to it. I seek to persuade, not compel, others to accept my of view. If my arguments are compelling, I welcome your support. If they are not, good luck to you. I don’t know how to be more reasonable than that.
- More choices are not better. Many equate freedom with more choices, but ultimately more choices mean more bad choices. I respect my own children’s freedom, but I steer them away from destructive choices. My kids can choose to play soccer, baseball, tennis, or whatever, but I insist they pick something. They can have a phone (a necessity, they insist), but must use it responsibly or it will be taken away. If I open up the world and place no limits on them, I would worry where they would wind up. They do not know intuitively which choices are good. The worst choices, in fact, often seem good initially. If I didn’t guide them at all, I would blame myself for ruining their lives–and eventually they would blame me as well.
- The people in the pride parade seek fulfillment for themselves first; they understand little about sacrificing for others: a spouse or children or anyone else; yet, healthy relationships are the most fulfilling aspects of life. They celebrate themselves; they live by their own standards, but life isn’t just about you. Children brought into this upside-down world are the ones hurt the most. Children thrive best with stable parental relationships and with clear boundaries; the prideful people do not demonstrate they can be healthy role models or are willing to provide any boundaries for children. This is alarming to me. If everyone were like this, we would threaten the sustainability of the human race.
- Limitless sexual choices are not good, especially for children who have no experience or understanding of sex, but also not for adults who may wind up burdened with disease, broken hearts as they bounce from relationship to relationship, and floundering with a new ideologies which they, along with the rest of the world, are still trying to figure out. More choices in sexuality and gender allow an escape outlet for a time, but they are not going to solve the real problems in your life. It seems like a new drug that will let you down eventually.
- The lack of self-control becomes a problem as well. The meaning of life is not found in your own self-indulgence. We all go through such phases, but hopefully we mature and realize fulfilling relationships are best for ourselves, our friends, our family, and our culture. Such problems can overcome anyone, no matter gender or sexual preference, but they are more likely in a prideful world without boundaries.
- I cannot emphasize enough the problems with exposing inexperienced and unprepared children into this ideology. Around 1:45 mark and again around the 5:00 minute mark in Savannah’s DC Pride video, she interviews two young ladies who appear to be in their mid-teens. My heart breaks to hear them describe their journey which began for each around the age of ten and has led them to all sorts of expressions of sexuality just a few years later. What do they really know about what they are caught up in? How will any of these ideas or new found freedoms help them as they become adults in a few years?
Around the 5:45 point, there is a video of an older man fondling someone who appears to be a minor boy. I am horrified and disgusted. Nobody else shown in the video seems to care. Such wanton expressions of sexuality are present throughout the video. These people clearly state children should be exposed and they are excited for a more open society which will not stigmatize any such behaviors in the future.
Fox News recently had a story about Ryland, a young girl who knew she was trans before she could speak. Do you expect me to believe this is even possible? Her mother wrote a book about the experience when she was five. She had this all planned out? How is a child to resist such a determined parent? Perhaps his parents meant well, but why were they in such a hurry and what if they were wrong?
- This is all new and not very well thought out. In the Daily Wire’s new documentary “What is a Woman?” (trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=42ivIRd9N8E), Matt Walsh travels to Kenya and describes to them our American beliefs. The Kenyans are amused at some ideas and totally baffled by others. In a manner that anyone can understand, they explain to Walsh what it means to be a man and a woman, beliefs we all shared until five seconds ago. Many Americans are blinded by this new ideology; they believe we have progressed beyond these simple ideas. Our culture has regressed and the Kenyans recognize it. The Kenyans want nothing to do with our culture after hearing it described to them. They recognize it as antithetical and harmful to all they believe in. They will avoid it as long as they can.
- Knee jerk affirmation is anything but kind. I am supposed to say: “Sure, I will affirm any behavior you want me to, even if may ruin your life.”? Many believe they are simply accepting others by accepting their deviant sexual behaviors. That’s not the definition of accepting, certainly not one of compassion either. Many believe we must accept their sexual behavior or we are not accepting them as people. I have never demanded anyone accept my view of my own sexual life in order for me to feel accepted. This is not reality.
No child is ever wrong or confused in their decision to become trans, gay, or other? This is what folks on the other side of the argument would have us believe. We care deeply about kids like the ones Savannah interviews, kids like Ryland, kids that have nobody to tell them where they have gone astray. Yet, people who think they are a whole lot smarter than the rest of us say differently:
June 15, 2022 – President Joe Biden issued an executive order today banning conversion therapy and offering other LBGTQI+ protections as part of White House efforts to advance equality during Pride Month.
“My order will use the full force of the federal government to end inhumane practices of conversion therapy,” Biden said in a speech before signing the order. “This is the first time the federal government is making a coordinated effort against this dangerous and discredited practice.”
Conversion therapy is any emotional or physical therapy used to “cure” or “repair” a person’s attraction to the same sex, or their gender identity and expression. Providers claim these therapies can make someone heterosexual or “straight.” But there’s no evidence to support this.
Again, we are told we must believe that no child is ever wrong, not the confused girls that Savannah Hernandez interviews, not Ryland who is clearly transgender before age two, not all the other kids who believe in both Santa Claus and transgenderism.
What is conversion therapy, in any case? Strapping a child to a machine and shocking them back to reality? Hardly. Often it is as simple as psychotherapy with a licensed MD. https://www.webmd.com/sex-relationships/what-is-conversion-therapy.
Talking to a therapist about your new gender identity must be banned? Children must be believed–even by trained therapists? Parents as well are banned from any counsel which might dissuade or even delay a child? I counsel and often correct my children on all manner of activities far less significant than permanently altering their gender, yet our all-knowing, all-caring, never-wrong-about-anything federal government says my child must be allowed to try this new fad that all the kids are talking about. What sense does this make?
- A friend of mine in a debate with others, posed the following questions:
- Should women have to share bathrooms and locker rooms with biological men?
- Should biological men be allowed to compete in women’s sports? (the answer seems to be heading in the right direction: https://dailycaller.com/2022/06/19/fina-bans-biological-males-competing-womens-sports/)
- Should young girls be encouraged to bind their breasts in order to appear like boys? Should young boys tuck their penises in order to appear more like girls?
- Should these boys and girls take puberty blockers at a young age? Should they take opposite sex hormones?
- As teenagers, should they have healthy breasts or genitals removed?
- Should boys have vaginoplasty to turn the remnants of their penises into fake vaginas, creating in effect wounds that will never heal? Should girls have swaths of flesh cut from their arms or legs in phalloplasty to give them fake penises that will likewise never truly heal?
I would answer “No” to all these. Biological changes are being made for gender identity which is fluid and based on feelings. What happens when your feelings change next month or next year? “Experts” separate biology and gender in their ideology, but when it comes to effectuating change you can’t separate the two. Biological changes are how transgenderism is ultimately manifested. Justice Brown-Jackson said she didn’t know what a woman was because she “is not a biologist”. Well, is it about biology or not? https://seek-the-truth.com/2022/04/08/judge-kentaji-brown-jackson-whats-a-woman/
Several of the experts interviewed in “What is a Woman?” said the switch back can be made at any time. It is completely safe and easily reversible according to them. Do you believe them? I don’t.
Scott Newgent, who transitioned from female to male at age 42 recently wrote an expose on what the trans life has become for him. Scott clearly indicates the choice should be made with great trepidation. Forget What Gender Activists Tell You. Here’s What Medical Transition Looks Like (quillette.com). Scott is also featured in “What is a Woman?”.
9. It is a fad. One of my debating partners said this:
On the fad, there may be some to whom this is a fad; but if so it is a very small number and that should not lead us to denying the entire transgender community their rights. We are starting to recognize them and to understand how they can be enabled to be productive contributors to the society as a whole. There will be some trial and error along the way. I do not think we have it right currently; but we need to continue to move forward.
Also, for every example that you might show where someone may have been brainwashed by this fad; there are hundreds of examples of transgender people who have been discriminated against – with much greater harm being done.
Gay pride is celebrated everywhere. There is now an entire pride month. Advocates and signs are everywhere. My employer and my wife’s employer highlight it continually, especially in June. Burger King, Disney, the Audubon Society, and virtually every corporation have jumped on the bandwagon.
An Orthodox Jewish institution was recently told they must have a pride club, despite the conflict to their religious beliefs, more forcing the ideology down our throats. https://www.nytimes.com/2022/06/16/nyregion/yeshiva-univ-lgbtq-club.html. Chris Evans, star of the new Lightyear movie tells us we are bigots if we avoid this new movie due to its gay moment. Canada punishes folks who mis-gender others. We didn’t even know what that was five years ago. This is coming to the US soon. Critics like me are banned from social media and told (inaccurately) we are full of hate. Who is being denied their right to express themselves? I don’t see it, unless you are referring to me. Please enlighten me with specific examples.
Where is the harm to transgenders he speaks of? Perhaps he means the suicide rate which remains abnormally high for transgender folks, no matter the openness of our society, the accessibility to affirmation surgery, or anything else. The hatred and suicide problem is to be blamed on folks like me who resist the trend that is enveloping our culture?
https://www.foxnews.com/politics/michigan-ag-says-drag-queens-make-everything-better-school. A good advertisement for home schooling if you ask me.
https://www.christianpost.com/news/nancy-pelosi-drag-queens-are-what-america-is-all-about.html Nancy Pelosi tells us she is “deeply Catholic”. What guides her value system in reality?
Yes, also it is a fad. Every succeeding generation has higher LGBTQ rates, from under 1% in the oldest generation to now a rate more than 25 times higher. This is the very definition of a fad. As Bill Maher suggested, we will all be LGBTQ in a few years. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mMBzfUj5zsg
We need commonly held standards and values or we cannot stay together as a nation. I don’t know where we will find them. WebMD says: “Respecting a person’s pronouns is an important part of creating a welcoming, accepting space, which impacts people’s well-being and mental health.” How about you respect our view of the English language?
This story shocked me. The Daily Mail changed the victim’s words to comply with the paper’s preferred pronoun preference. The woman went home with a transgender male; he was upset she declined sex once learning his true identity. She was raped, but the newspaper changed the context completely: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-10870705/BBC-changed-rape-victims-quotes-avoid-misgendering-trans-attacker.html, Can we just get the news unfiltered?
The values at the pride parade are all over the lot. They will not hold together. They are inclusive only of people who believe as they do. Judeo-Christian values have survived thousands of years. I am talking about the values themselves; I am not necessarily limiting you to these religions. Even atheists recognize the role such values have played: https://www.press-citizen.com/story/opinion/2019/05/03/atheist-sees-importance-god-civilization/1091030001/. Judeo-Christian values (correctly applied) are truly inclusive. They are able to withstand pressure more substantial than someone saying “I disagree”. They have served billions well. These new pride values have not been widely applied and adhered to by many civilizations (they are just now arriving in Kenya). They have not served even those who advocate for them well.
See this additional link from Savannah Hernandez. They all say the gay pride flag is so wonderful, but the American flag means little to most of these folks. What is to bind us together? How can we share a country, a civilization, a world with such polar opposite views? American values and protected freedoms are what allow them to express themselves. The American flag should unite us, not divide us. I fear for our longevity as a nation with the pride flag leading the way. I fear self-indulgence will prevail over self-sacrifice. It is not a sustainable value. We won’t last long with it leading the way.
Anyway, it’s not a right/left issue. It’s a right/wrong issue, and America has constantly been on the side of what’s right. Because when it comes down to it, this is about keeping faith with the idea of America. Because America’s an idea, isn’t it? I mean, Ireland’s a great country, but it’s not an idea. Great Britain’s a great country, it’s not an idea. That’s how we see you around the world, as one of the greatest ideas in human history, right up there with the Renaissance, right up there with crop rotations and the Beatles’ White album. The idea, the American idea—it’s an idea—the idea is that you and me are created equal, and will ensure that an economic recession need not become an equality recession. The idea that life is not meant to be endured but enjoyed. The idea that if we have dignity, if we have justice then leave it to us, and we’ll do the rest. This country was the first to claw its way out of darkness and put that on paper. And God love you for it, because these aren’t just American ideas anymore. There’s no copyright on them. You brought them into the world. It’s a wide world now. I know Americans say they have a bit of the world in them, and you do, the family tree has lots of branches. But the thing is, the world has a built of America in it, too. These truths, your truths, they’re self-evident in us.” – Bono (U2 band member)
2 thoughts on “Pride and Pride Month: A Fad and a Problem”
You: In fact, I will discourage it or offer an alternative given the opportunity. I think my view is better (don’t we all think this way?), but I do not require you to accept mine.
Me: And this is your way of listening? It defines the problem. No one is asking you to believe that you might be homosexual, though I bet the thought crossed your mind in one way or another over your lifetime, and you have rejected it outright without examining it. God told you man shall not lie with man. Period. But he did not say your male friend shall not lie with man. Your god was talking to you, about you. You made the choice, though you will never admit it. You don’t think you ever had the choice, you were born the way you are.
But there lies the problem. When it comes to your sexuality, there is no choice. You are what you are, but so are other people, whatever they are. No one suddenly chooses to be homosexual, or heterosexual, or bisexual, or asexual, or whatever kind of “sexual” you want to discuss. You are attracted to women. I too am attracted to women. This attraction came naturally to me. I kissed my first girl, really kissed her, when I was about 6 or 7 years old. Nobody told me I had a choice, I did not choose to be attracted to girls, I just was. But that does not mean every guy in the world should be attracted to girls, or should not be attracted to both girls and other guys, it is the wsy they were born!
Yet you will try to discourage a man from being attracted to another man, and you will get upset if someone suggests you should be attracted to other men. Did anyone ever suggest such a thing to you? No! Of course not! But you are telling other people who they should be attracted to. You are not considering their feelings, their desires. You are not allowing them to be what they were born to be! Why do you need to discourage them? Are they somehow affecting how you live your life? WHAT effect are they having on your life? Because they exist it somehow changes your existence? Because they are gay, you wonder if you should be gay? No, you don’t wonder that?
They don’t wonder either if they should be straight just because you are straight. Their lives are not affected by how you live your life. Have you ever even sat down and talked to a gay man, and had a conversation with him? I bet you have, only you did not know it, so you did not converse about sexual orientation. Who the hell talks about sexual orientation? No one! So why does it bother you to know there are gay men in this world? I never think about it. So why should you?
Yet you think you have the right to discourage a person from being who they are. Until someone tries to discourage you from being hetetosexual, you do not have the right to discourage anyone else from being who they are. And that is the TRUTH!
Hello from the UK
Many thanks for your post. I think this is well balanced and very helpful. If i may add that the problem with the LGBTQ+ activists is that their bodies and souls have been poisoned and this has, if you will accepted the word here, buggered them up.
Most have suffered some trauma in their lives, many have grown up without a father or father figure, have been physically or mentally abused or both. Two world wars caused immense damage psychologically. Often mothers have not wanted a boy and they have confused their child by their trying to feminise them.
Add to this the numerous toxins in the environment and drugs pedalled by big pharma and you have a recipe for chaos and confusion. These toxins, these chemicals, mess with people’s brains and so they end up not knowing who they really are.
Ultimately they crave love and affection; love and affection we all need of course.
In my home town they used to have parades where everybody who ran a business or say a scout group could do a float. There were bands and all sorts. It was great fun. Nowadays all we see is division, them and us. The LGBTQ+ activists want to make it all about them. It is narcissist behaviour.
The stem root of narcissist is from narcotic, a drugging effect. They are drugged with self-obsessive love which is self-destructive of society as a whole. This impacts us all whether Rawgod who comments above likes it or not.
So well said, and thank you again for addressing this difficult issue.
Please excuse the nom-de-plume, this is as much for fun as a riddle for people to solve if they wish.